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I am in deep depression. I have anxiety and ocd..... I hate to be like this. I am so weary. I can't go on anymore like this. I just cannot. I am dragging my feet. I cannot go on like this anymore. I am going to be physically sick if this goes on.

I need to heal myself. I need to get well. Is it going to be a long and tedious task?
I dunno..I am just so depressed. I am totally checked out. I feel numbed. Maybe I want to feel nothing cos when I feel...I only feel pain and agony and stress. I am not so strong. I cannot go on doing something I dun like doing for far too long.

This has gone on far too long. I just hate myself for doing this to myself. I have allowed myself to be in this situation. I had totally brought this upon myself cos I have put myself last for so long. I had neglected myself for so long. I want things to be perfect for my child. So I allowed myself to undergo all this stress and where does this lead me? To the nervous wreck that I am today.

I totally regret. Really feel so bad about myself. I hate all these. I dun enjoy all these at all and that is the truth. This marriage feels like a whole bunch of duties and responsibilities. No sharing , no communication, no understanding...no care ...no love. This is how I feel. Totally bored of everything. I feel so bad. Sometimes I wonder whether it is pms or wat? Just that I feel totally unfulfilled.

So tired and so weary. How much longer can I put up with this? I dunno....

God, please help me. Please tell me what I should do now. Ease my pain and suffering.
Please lead me to the correct path. I wanna get out of this pain.