Tired

I am depressed and very tired. I guess I am really exhausted. I need a rest and a break from all the usual stuff. I dunno how I have gotten into all these.

If I go on like this..I will wither. I am already withering. I need new goals to carry on. I cannot carry on like this totally aimless. I need a new directio. A totally new outlook in life. I used to be so engrossed in romance as if it was my entire life. I regretted that. I guess there is more to life than romance. Sigh...

I feel totally motivationless. Stuck in a state of inaction and inertia. I need to snap out of this stupor but I dunno how. I am just do tired of everything. Of my routine , of myself...of everything. I am just so bored out of my mind. I need a rest in all areas....physical, mental, emotional and spiritual.

I have lost all my zest. All my motivation in life. All my curiosity about life. I used to love to do new things. I used to enjoy living my life. Now I wonder..where is my life? My life is overtaken by this person whom I dun even recognise anymore.

I have stopped doing things that I wanna do for so long that I dun even know what I wanna do now. I feel totally lost. Totally aimless and totally depressed. Like I have settled in my life and I dun like it. I have never followed my heart. Where is that zestful, enthusiastic gal who loves life? Who loves doing new things in life? Who enjoys all the things that she enjoys? Where is she? Will I ever get that gal back? Will I evolved into a better person? I do not know. All I know is that I am thoroughly depressed now. I feel so stuck.

I need to make small steps to regain my true self again. I cannot be stuck in this depression. I have to live on. I have to choose to live. I have to choose life. I cannot be so dead inside. I cannot alow myself to die inside. I need to have hope despite everything. I need to be happy despite all my ailments. I need to heal myself of all my ailments. I need to pamper myself. I need to love myself again and do what I want again. I need to make my own comeback. I NEED TO.